Friday, September 23, 2005

I'll Take A Pack Of Menthols, Today's 'Times', And... Oh - Are Those Melons Ripe?

Blood Bath Pictures is casting for "Bikini Blood Bath," an indie DV feature horror film starring Debbie XXXXX. Jon XXXXX & Thomas XXXXX, dir.-prods.; Bruce XXXXX, prod. Shooting Oct. 15-23 in central CT. Seeking—Actresses: attractive females, ages 18-35, lead and supporting roles, nudity required. Auditions will be held Sept. 24, 4-8 p.m. at The Underground Deli, (Like, as in and actual deli? Where you can get a sandwich and a pickle?) 1537 Stanley St., New Britain, CT (across the street from CCSU, beneath Another Bookstore, at Central Square Plaza). Sides will be provided and the auditions will be filmed. At the optional callback, one topless scene will be performed off-camera (in front of two male producers and two female casting assistants). Because they don't care how your breasts look on-camera. And they don't want to be disrespectful of you, you know, by having you taped naked if you don't get the part. They would never disrespect women like that when they can just simply pull you aside into the handicap stall of the men's room at - what I am sure is - a very nice food store and have you flash them there, where the image of your boobs will only remain in their twisted minds and NOT on film. They would never do that. Ever. Because they obviously see women as being very worthwhile and respectable creatures, with a lot more to offer the world than some b-rated acting and their exposed bosoms. If you cannot attend the auditions, send pix, résumés, and reels to Attn: Jon XXXXX, XXXXX, Plantsville, CT 96479; email XXXXX.com; or call Jon at XXXXX. For more info, visit www.bikinibloodbath.com. Pay (although you're not getting paid for the naked callback), plus videocopy, credit, meals, and lodging provided. Nonunion.

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