Wednesday, May 22, 2002

Just Because We Hired You Doesn't Mean You're Worth A Paycheck

Dolce & Gabana, Versace, Moschino and Cache Fashion Show This Thursday evening the 23rd in DC at the Grand Opening of the hottest new club in DC. Please email me immediately your best headshot and body shot if you would like to be considered. Females must be 5'9" and above and Males 6' and above. XXXXX.com I need 6 guys and 6 girls. Pay if you are good enough.

Monday, May 20, 2002

Well, If That's Your Attitude...

Dear Actresses,

We have just begun casting for a low-budget indie feature revolving around the premise of four young and vibrant yet struggling female artists who then decide, out of pure desperation, to all commit to a plan of deadly consequences in hopes that then, at least the one remaining, will reap some rewards. (*shivers* Ooooh... This long-winded run-on sentence sounds vague... and really lame...) We are casting for FOUR amazingly attractive actresses (aged 18-28) (of course you are) who can play both attitude and desperation very well -- and in both personal reflection and dialogue delivery. (You mean - "act"?!) If your image can hold the viewer's eye, then your performance should carry the story with even greater intrigue. We have learned from experience, that casting notices literally yield hundreds and hundreds of submissions, and every single one starts off with the same old "I'm a well trained and enthusiastic actress with great range and a marketable image and I'm looking to .... blah, blah, blah ..." SO please,spare us & yourself, (ME-OW!!!) and just mention a couple relevant lines (For example: Bust, waist, hips...) about your ability and work ethic to contribute to this type of project specifically. And what is very, very helpful, is if you can include a few e-mail addresses of other directors who can comment on your work, or even just support you as a quality reference. NON-union

Hey, if I get cast, will you promise to yell at me some more?