Thursday, April 14, 2005

Decent Is The New Sexy

check out this week
This week we have so great people coming so you won't want to miss this. This Friday there will be 2 Directors looking for actress and actors for there films One is a horror movie the other a comedy 1 is sag experimental. Every other week we do a networking event there and we always have celebrities So here is the deal we need ladies 18 to 30 good looking for this new horror movie Ladies must be good scream queen type and have good attitude. Guys must be good looking or decent. And not mid makeup and special effects There is some pay for this <>
Sincerely,JT
JT
JT Talent & Casting

"Good looking or decent" and "not mid makeup and special effects"? Dude, that is HARSH.
...

Invite The Whole Family!

"BIBLICAL BITCHES" LMNO THEATRE
LMNO Theatre Company is casting four women for a summer production of Jeff Bedillion's "Biblical Bitches." Seeking—Eve: 20s, heroine-chic, dark poet; Delilah: 30s, white trash, rock 'n' roll songstress; Jessie Belle: 40s, voluptuous, country-western singer-dancer; Magdalene: 20s, porn star turned pop star. Some nudity. No pay for rehearsals. Per performance stipend. Send pix & resumes to LMNO Theatre Company, PO Box XXXXX, NYC 10014, Attn: Bitches.

Ever see that episode of Seinfeld where he dates the nude chick and decides that not all nudity is good nudity, and that there are just some things one shouldn't do in the nude? Remember that? Well, I have a feeling that rock n' roll and country/western singing and dancing fall into that that category, too.


Lame Title? Check.

"BEYOND THE PALISADES"

4/16, 4/17, 4/23, and 4/24 from 12noon-5PM at XXXXX W. 92 St., Suite 22D, NYC. Mary Allen Productions will be holding auditions for a reading of its new play "Beyond the Palisades." To be read in July at The Dramatist Guild of America. John XXXXX, writer. Seeking—Elvee Tulsa: lead, in the early 1970s, a woman, a singer from New Orleans (singing not required) is conned by a man, Dakota Raye, who promises her stardom beyond her wildest dreams in NYC. Instead of bringing her to the lights of Broadway, he takes her to the streets of Palisades, NJ. He strips her of everything she was and leads her into a life of drugs, stripping and prostitution, 20-40; Dakota Raye: pimp and slime ball, in every sense of the word, The Devil himself, late 20s, any type; Jade: 20s, fellow prostitute and friend of Elvee; Angie: 20s, fellow prostitute and friend of Elvee; Billie: late teens-20, child born mute and daughter of Elvee, all acting is physical; Marta: a homeless woman who carries the body of the play. Also seeking: street types of the 1970s, anything from riff raff, street beggars, male prostitutes, slime, and johns who cheat on their wives. They will steal anything from anyone, including him or her. Elements from deep within the belly of the beast, any type, any age, very colorful. Especially seeking--Francesca: pretty male homosexual prostitute, any type, very colorful; Craig: pretty male homosexual prostitute, any type, very colorful; Blue: homeless stret musician, any type; Zataran: homeless heroin addict, any type, talks to himself; Hogan: slime, riff raff, walks with a limp and stutters his words. Ethnic types encouraged to audition. Pay involved (Oh yeah? To what degree? Because for some reason I don't believe you…). Prepare a three- to five-minute monologue (Holy crap! That's an effing long monologue!). May be asked to read from script. Auditions will be held Sat. April 16, Sun. April 17, Sat. April 23, and Sun. April 24 from 12noon-5PM at XXXXX W. 92 St., Suite 22D, NYC.

Sad, lonely, talented woman desperate for stardom? Check.
Prostitute? Check.
Homeless person? Check.
Physically or mentally challenged character? Check.
Innocent child caught in the drama? Check.
Character named after a state? Check
Character named after a precious/semi-precious stone or gem? Check.
Stripping, drugs, prostitution and at least three forms of "slime"? Check.

Order your tickets now people - this is gonna be a hit!