Wednesday, July 31, 2002

Hot As Smoke?

Subject: Need back-up Group for showcase HOT AS SMOKE FEMALE SINGER SONG WRITER NEAR SIGNING COLLABORATING WITH BIG NAMES seeks group for showcase and creative mind melt (is that like a tuna melt?).(think Madonna, Finoa, Pretenders, Gwen, Shirley Manson,Beyoncee). Dinah

Is this a sentence? Quick - my de-coder ring!

Tuesday, July 30, 2002


"Again," a 16mm color film is seeking—Angie: 30-35, Hispanic, assimilated, pretty, intelligent, vulnerable, nice persona; Don: 30-35, black, handsome, asssimated, intelligent, intense writer. No pay, but videocopy, credit, and meals provided. Shooting late October. Send pix & resumes by September to Alex XXXXX, dir.-prod'r, PO Box XXXXX, NYC XXXXX; or email NON-UNION PERFORMERS.

I don't even know what that word is supposed to be. And I looked up "assimated" in the dictionary... nothing.

Wednesday, July 17, 2002

Which Type Are You?

Megaworks Universe, Inc. is seeking: three sexy female performers, anywhere from model types to stripper types to Pamela Lee types who look 18 - 25. Must be outgoing, fun natured (Fun natured?), and comfortable wearing minimal clothing (Who isnt?). No nudity. All ethnic groups desired. Future pay. Chosen performers will be part of a techno/rock band's live shows and will interact with the other band members. Must have transportation to and from the NYC area. Great opportunity for exposure. Non-Union Performers. Send pix and resume (body shot preferred, snapshots ok) to: Megaworks Universe, Inc.P.O. Box XXXXX, New York, NY 10028 or email:

I know, the differences are subtle, but subtlty is what this project is all about!

Tuesday, July 16, 2002

Nudity Required/No Pay

TriQuest Films is casting for the feature "Black Whisper" about an over-the-hill actor who sleepwalks his way into murder, then into the life of his victim. "Strangers on a Train" meets "Purple Noon." Seeking—Jeff: murderer, actor, 48, very cool, remorseless, cunning; Szabina—the widow, 30, complex, bisexual, honest, an exhibitionist, consumed by love, brilliant, beautiful, speaks fluent German, nudity required; Phillip: the victim, Hollywood producer, 49, handsome, successful; Dickie Randall: 50, fundraiser, knows everybody who is anybody in the theatre, gay, slightly effeminate; PI Conrad: a sleazy detective, ruthless, 40, rakish; Clare: 19, a beautiful inexperienced girl of good family, determined to find her sister who has vanished under mysterious circumstances, hires Conrad who catapults her into a world at odds with her religious upbringing, nudity required; Mary: Clare's sister, takes a position as maid at Phillip's estate, nudity required; The Stranger: indefineable, stalks Szabina, androgynous, compelling, relentless, key to Szabina, her life, her future, a spy, possible nudity. No pay. Send pictures and resumes to director Ralph XXXXX at 1210 XXXXX Road, Wallingford, CT XXXXX. No phone calls. NON-SAG PEFORMERS.

What? Like, almost everyone in this film gets naked - except the androgenous character, which I find very amusing that he/she is listed only as "possible nudity".

Friday, July 12, 2002

Sexy Naked Clowns?

Subject: Model needed in Pennsylvania, featured extras needed Non-union film seeking a model to be featured in magazine which appears as a prop in the film. Looking for a curvacious model between the ages of 18 and 30 (no experience needed) for the prop magazine "PlayKlown", a riff on Playboy. Suggested nudity, but nothing will actually be revealed. You will be in "clown" make-up for the shoot. This is part of a very humorous scene, sure to be one of the most memorable in the movie. (I bet. And naked but dressed as a clown is exactly how every actress hopes to be remembered, for sure.) No pay, but a great chance to get your foot in the door with an award-winning production company (...that doesn't pay you for your work. So... really, what have you gained?). You will receive a copy of the film and credit in the film. Must be able to drive to our location near Pittsburgh, PA. Also needed, non-union extras for a big town-vigilante scene. Extras should be between the ages of 18 and 70, all looks/ethnicities welcome. Must be able to supply your own transportation. You will be credited in the film for your appearance. Tentatively scheduled to shoot in Late July. Email me at with a photo if interested. Janell

If this is what she considers a good opportunity, I'd hate to know what she thinks is a bad one.

Monday, July 08, 2002

Planning Your Bible School Day Trip?

Triple Play Productions is casting its world premiere of "Gomorrah," a sexually subversive retelling of the Book of Genesis at HERE in September. Seeking: five women/two men, early to mid-20s. Auditions will beheld Mon. July 8 from 6-11PM at a location to be announced. Email pix & resumes to for an appointment and details. Some roles require nudity. No pay.

It's sexy. It's subversive. It's the entire book of Genesis condensed in a raunchy, twisted one-and-a-half-hour long original off-off Broadway drama. Will she be turned into a pillar of salt? Will all those animals fit on that arc? Are Eve's breasts real? Find out in... "Gomorrah"!


Pixies, Fairies, Sprites, Leprechauns, Genies, And Now...

Casting for "The Magic Whore" a one-act to beperformed July 13th-14th at The Theatre Studio (longerrun possible). No Pay. Jeremy XXXXX, director.Looking for a woman to play a dominatrix and a man to play her client. email

I want to know what makes her so magical. I really do.

Monday, July 01, 2002

Sounds Riveting

The Thespian Project is seeking: Many roles for apilot program for a cable television series, "EbonyDawn Moments." The first five stories will be filmed with little dialogue but intense emotions—therefore, you must have exceptional facial expressions and goodbodily gestures. One episode includes brief suggested nudity (bath tub scene). Seeking: males and females,all types, ages, and ethnicities. Shooting inmid-July. No pay, but opportunity for exposure. Video,CD, or DVD copies are provided. Send pix & resumes toThe Thespian Project, PO Box XXXXX, NJ XXXXX.

Ok, I hate to say this, I really do, but I know you are ALL thinking it: "Ebony Dawn Moments"? Should we all grab a section of the Times before watching this film?